What We're Thankful For...

Can you believe it????

It has been two months since we brought Jaycee home with us. In a way, it doesn't seem like that long ago, but then again, she keeps changing all the time, that it seems like she is growing up so much.

Just a week ago, I had to put her newborn clothes away. It made me kind of sad to think that she will never wear those things again, but so fun to see her looking at things and smiling and making noises besides crying. That first month was a lot of learning about each other. Here she is in one of my favorite newborn outfits, that when we left the hospital, it didn't even fit her.

Now she is getting into the 0-3 months sizes, but those are so varying that it is hard to know what really fits her. Sometimes we have to try a couple of things and I change her a few times to be sure that a specific size fits. Who knew that I would have so much fun dressing and changing a baby girl. While I love putting her in several cute outfits, she does NOT like changing her clothes very much. I am hoping that will change.

We are so blessed to be able to be parents to Jaycee, and experience having a little one in the house. After such a long time of emptiness, it is nice to have another baby to hold and love and just watch grow and smile and play.

This year, the holidays are starting to present a much more hopeful and happy attitude for us. For so long, I didn't even want to anticipate the holidays and wanted to just get through them. I started to think that I had to come up with new traditions because I felt different and I am different. Being a mom this time around is not at all what I expected it to be. I want my daughter to be safe and I wonder if I am doing right by her ALL the time, but I also have hope that only God has been able to give me, that despite how crazy I feel and how much I don't know what I am doing sometimes, He is holding us both and some things really aren't as BIG as I see them sometimes. I also know that we have one special little boy who is watching us from heaven, and that helps me to know that when I can't be with Jaycee or when I worry if she is ok, Caden is calming my heart and saying, "Mom, don't worry. I'm watching her." For that I am truly thankful.

So this holiday season, I am going to enjoy spending time with family and friends, celebrate being a mom again, and praise God for the hope that Jesus has brought to our lives. We have so much to thank God for this season.

Tom, Mira, & Jaycee

Adjusting

We have been with Jaycee now for 6 weeks. She has been such a blessing to our lives. I can hardly believe that she is over a month old now. It seems like only yesterday that I was in the hospital giving birth to her, and now there is something that changes about her everyday. She has been a lot of fun to have in our house and has given us so much to be thankful for. She has made our lives happier and exciting.

Tom and I have had a few adjustments to make being new to taking care of a baby. We both were not entirely aware about how little sleep we can actually survive on. I don't know what I did before, but I can live on small amounts of sleep more than what I thought. We also have had to figure out which jobs in taking care of Jaycee that each of us are better at doing. Tom by far does a better job of giving her a bath, and he has said that I do a better job of putting her to sleep at night. Sometimes I wonder about that, but we have been learning which jobs to let each other do and which jobs we can do on our own.

Tom has been great with her. There have been a couple of times that I just needed some time to myself, so he is always so proud to watch her and let me have some time to go out with a friend to get coffee (since I don't like coffee, I get a carmel apple spice drink from Starbucks), or to just go by myself to get groceries or whatever. He loves watching her anytime. Even now that he is back to work, he comes home and wants to just hold her b/c he has not seen her all day long.

So our family is doing ok right now, and we have been so very blessed by all that God is doing in our lives. He is teaching us everyday how to be the kind of parents that will bring glory to Him. I hope that as Jaycee gets older, she sees that too.



Tom, Mira, & Jaycee

Halloween 2009

This year for Halloween we didnt' really do the typical handing out of treats. Jaycee is still too little to take out for that long, and I didn't want her to get too cold. So we had a pumpkin outfit that I had bought for her about a week before she was born and Tom set up a pumpkin patch in our front room. Here are the results!!!



This is Jaycee's Pumpkin Patch. She has already grown since she was born. I am amazed at how fast she has changed since then. This was a really fun time for her too, because she loves to look out of the windows all over our house.

We attempted to go gracery shopping with her and get a few things that we were running out of, and on our way out of Dillons, they were handing out grocery bags and told me to pick out as many medium sized pumpkins that I wanted. I think that they wanted to get rid of them. So Tom tried to see if Jaycee could hold it in her hand. This lasted for about 5 seconds, but I caught the picture.

I think that she was yawning here, but who knows. She is really funny when she is awake. She still sleeps a lot, and I try to sleep when she does, but when she is awake, I try to get some cute pictures of her.

Halloween was fun this year. We went to church on Saturday night and we have started to have pizza night right after church, and we tried to do that too. She was really good for both. She loved the praise and worship music, but as soon as pastor started to preach, she was a little fussy, but I held her, and she settled down right away. The sermon was the last one on spiritual warfare. It was so what I needed to hear. At times I have gotten a little anxious about going anywhere with Jaycee, b/c I don't know if I will know what to do if she starts to get unhappy, but I am everyday leaving that in God's hands and praying that He will give me the knowledge and understanding to know what to do at those times. I am sure that as I do more and more things with her, I will get more comfortable.

Jaycee has sure helped us learn to enjoy life again.

Love,

Tom, Mira, & Jaycee

Remembering

Today Caden would have been 2 years old. It hardly seems like it has been that long. So much has happened since then, but on the other hand, we think about him everyday. We wonder what he would be like, what kind of attitude would he have had, how would our family have been different than it is now, and so much more.

Just this morning, we were going back through some of the things that we had gotten after we left the hospital without him. We never thought that we would be having to plan a memorial for our first child. I started thinking back to that time and how I have changed so much and how really our lives have been turned around as a result.

As we were looking back through Caden's things, we remember Agape Care Cradle and how much they helped us to get through the worst moment of our lives. I honestly never thought that I would be able to live my life again. That first year seemed like it took forever and I just wanted something to be happy about again, but the sadness would not leave me. I hated that!!!

Now looking back, I realize that my tears are not for Caden. He is in the best place possible, but they are for us, the ones left behind. We will never be able to see what kind of person he might have been. Jaycee will not know her big brother. But what I do know is that God is taking care of him for all of us, and that Caden is watching us everyday providing an extra shield of protection for our family.

So today I just wanted to honor our first child, Caden Everett Ehrlich and to let him know that even though he is not here with us, he will never be forgotten.

We Love you Caden!!!!

Tom, Mira, & Jaycee

Our Newest Family Member

Meet

Jaycee Loelle Ehrlich

Born: Saturday October 3, 2009

4:28 am

Weight: 7 lbs. 2 oz.

Length: 19 1/2 inches

She already has a firm grip!!!

Enjoying the lights and being checked out for the first time.

Jaycee and her cousin Kelsey.

Grandma Ehrlich holding Jaycee for the very first time.

Getting ready for her first bath!!!

Checking vital signs!!!

Grandma Walker holding Jaycee for the very first time!!!!

Our family!!!!!

In the carseat getting ready to go home!!!!

We want to thank everyone so much for praying for Jaycee. She has been such a blessing to us, and we are so glad that she is finally here. The road that brought her to us has been hard and confusing at times, but God is ALWAYS good and He has given us the strength to do ALL things through Him.

We can't wait to see what God has in store for our family and will continue to keep you updated.

Love,

Tom, Mira, & Jaycee

Coming Soon!!!!

So I haven't had much time to blog as we are getting ready for this new girl to enter our lives. We have had a couple more biophysical profiles that are making sure that she is growing at a good rate and that she is moving and staying safe until she decides to join us.

So far everything is looking really good, my health is really good, and my anxiety levels are really good. I was talking to a friend just last week about how this pregnancy is so different and has given me so much peace. The only way to explain that is GOD. He knew what he was doing when he put me at this place in my life at this time. I often would wonder why certain things happened the way they do and the timing, b/c I certainly would have chosen something different for myself, but He has walked with Tom and I in such a very real way that instead of being more anxious and more worried about myself and this baby, we have really relied on GOD and have been able to TRUST him in ways that I never thought were possible again. It is amazing how much GOD really does love us and how close he has held Tom and I through our whole grief period and uncertainties about where life would be taking us.

Today we had another biophysical profile and Dr. appointment. The movements and everything else that they were looking for in the sonogram were great, and the Dr. said that I was progressing quite nicely. He even told me a date to be ready to come in to see if I was even more ready to have this baby. Well, later on today the nurse called me back and scheduled a time for me to be induced. I now have a for sure date that we will go into the hospital. While a part of that scares me, I am relieved that the Dr. wants to ease my anxiety and allow Tom and me to bring home a healthy baby.

So on October 7th, whatever it is that you might be doing, say a small prayer for our family and this little girl who will be coming into this world.


Tom & Mira
& soon to be baby!!!

Milestone

We have overcome a huge milestone in our lives. We have made it to 34 weeks. While, I was quite nervous about what would happen last week, so many people were praying for us all that I knew God was in control and had so much peace about how this baby is growing and how healthy she and me are.

This week has started off pretty well too. I feel like I can breathe a little easier now and that some more peaceful times are ahead for our family.

I have been so amazed by how many people have been praying for us. All throughout last week, I had friends call us, or stop by and hang out with us, or even send emails throughout the week just to let us know that they were praying extra hard for us last week. I also had a couple of friends let me know that even their own kids have been praying for baby Ehrlich this whole time. It brings tears to my eyes to know that this little girl is so loved by so many. She truly is a great blessing from God.

Tom and I have had to face many challenges these last couple of years, and it is amazing to see how God is using our pain to help and strengthen others when they think that life isn't worth moving on. I know that feeling completely. Last week did bring back some memories about where we were and what happened to us at that point in my pregnancy with Caden, but also brought us so much hope and joy that God really is holding us close to Him even when we can't see Him.

There have been several God things happen to us, that would seem very coincidental to anyone else, but to us, we know that God is definitely at work. One of those things is the Drs. office that I have been going to. It seems like they know what I need before I realize that I need it. That is definitely God at work. Another instance is that for the rest of my pregnancy, all of my appointments have been scheduled so that Tom can meet me there. Since I work in the mornings only, I usually schedule them during that time whatever works best for them, but they decided to schedule the rest of them and did it so that Tom could be there with me at every appointment. That is so God at work too. I also completely believe that God has been holding my heart and mind especially close throughout this pregnancy, and b/c of all of the prayers, I have not been as stressed out as I would normally be, even before losing Caden or being pregnant. I know that trying to be perfect and my little perfectionistic ways about me have been given over to God. He has given me the courage and strength to lay those things at his feet and to leave them there so that Satan has no foothold to work his way into my heart and mind. That has been what peace has looked liked in my life. For that I am thankful.

I often wonder about the timing of God and his plan for our lives, but I know that He does work out everything and I mean everything for His good. I may not ever know how grief could bring about something good, but as I look back on the last 2 years of my life, we see good things everyday. The things that were once important to me seem to be just things, and relationships with friends (new and old), family, and sharing openly and honestly with people we come in contact with has been something that we never thought we could do, but with the strength of God, peace has entered our lives in such a way that we can rest in His plan for us whatever that may be. I used to think that I had to have that figured out, but it is really exciting to see new things happening all the time in me, Tom, our families, and friends.

We just want to say a huge THANK YOU to everyone who has walked this road with us and has prayed for us this past week. It really was a giant hurdle to get through and now even though we still guard our hearts, the fear that we could have is a little less with your helpful prayers. Thanks so much for walking this road with us and for sharing in our lives. We are so excited to meet this new little girl soon.

Love,
Tom & Mira & Baby "Girl" Ehrlich

She has cute little chubby cheeks.